The Intern: Welcome to Coffee, Cults, and Empires, the only RPG podcast where the
players don't know they're being recorded.
Or, okay, no, that, that makes me sound like a creep.
I'm not a creep, I'm a journalist!
Welcome to Coffee, Cults, and Empires, where the coffee is terrible
and so is the company I work for.
Everyone, I'm sorry, I'm recording this from inside a dumpster outside the lab.
As you probably remember, I work for Inside the Box Sciences, Incorporated.
It's a cool lab where they created an experimental world on a petri dish, and
it's full of wonderful sentient beings.
I found out there's real people in there, including a group of professors playing
a tabletop RPG set in this world's past.
I thought it was so interesting that I made this podcast you're enjoying, and now
they're threatening to end the experiment.
There was a big security leak.
Me, and coincidentally this podcast, are that leak.
Well, they don't know it's me specifically, but they know it's an
intern, so... I'm locked out of the lab along with some of the other interns.
Alright, why am I in a dumpster?
I'm searching these dumpsters, trying to find out if they already ended this world.
I haven't found any remnants yet, so I think they're okay?
Oh hey, what-.
Why is this perfectly good coffee mug in here?
Boss, eh, guess he didn't like the truth.
Okay, well, I'll keep looking, but on to episode four.
If you missed last time, here's what you missed.
Our heroes, "no-nonsense" Hellena, and of course, the "nonsense only
when it comes to rolling in coffee grounds", Justice, "illusions wrapped
in illusions with a side of more illusions" Ruffort, "No longer covered
in spider guts" Georg, and "they're not followers, they're friends!" Urekas, have
properly started their investigation.
Their first step?
Harassing a local food seller.
Our heroes are not exactly the finest of detectives, but they make
up for it with dogged determination and enthusiasm for... breakfast?
Beeb, the food stall owner, just wanted to go home when the
party arrived late last night.
He was talking to a poorly disguised Second, that is, the second in command
of the guard, aka Breastplate Guy.
The party didn't see anything wrong with that.
But they did spend considerable time and resources hounding Beeb, who eventually
gave up an important clue: he'd make them breakfast tomorrow if they would
just go away and leave him alone.
Satisfied, but not sated, they went home, only then remembering that they actually
just wanted to talk to Tagak about the evil sorceress and her evil spidery plans.
We join them in their hotel, waking to the new day.
Will they get breakfast?
Is the breakfast giant spider on a stick?
Find out in this episode of Coffee Cults and Empires.
Tanam: Y'all harassed Beeb and then went to bed.
Do any of you have anything that you want to do in between that
time in the morning or, is it just, sleep, get yourself a long rest?
Harmony: I'm gonna put on my humidifier just to help my skin and then go to bed.
Tanam: Ha ha ha.
Vafrus: I'm gonna notify the wait staff that we're gonna need a lot more sheets.
Not sure what they're for yet, but we'll come up with something.
Don: I forgot about this.
We are gonna need a lot more sheets.
Tanam: Okay.
Then beyond that, I guess we have never hung out with you all in the morning.
Are you early risers?
How does that all look for you?
Don: Uh, Georg is definitely an early riser.
I mean, you can't be a coffee professional without it.
Rozafeen: Hellena is normally a late riser, but she can get
up early if she's on the move.
Vafrus: Yeah.
Calumn and Ruffort both are very lazy.
Unless something wakes me up, I'm sleeping till like noon.
Harmony: Urekas is a late riser.
She tends to wake up by just people telling her, "Oh, you look
so pretty when you're asleep!" And just lots of compliments.
So if she doesn't get those, she sleeps in even later.
Tanam: So I assume that Georg knows this.
Don: Oh yeah, by now I would say so.
So I make a bit of a racket in the morning, just getting the coffee
together for everyone, you know, put putting the presses together and
using the -- the pistons are not well made necessarily, cuz I mostly cobbled
them together out of scrap metal.
Vafrus: The coffee pistons...
Don: What?
You don't have coffee pistons?
Vafrus: Just pull the coffee rip cord on the coffee motor.
Don: Hey, look, sometimes you have to pull it a few times to get it to start, okay?
Harmony: I know what that sound means, so it feels aggressive.
But I wake up cause I'm pretty excited for this coffee.
Don: Yes.
So I make the coffee for people and, you know, sort of nudge the coffee at them;
get them to wake up at a reasonable time.
Tanam: You are all in separate rooms.
Do you try to open their doors and put the coffee at, at them directly or do you just
-- Don: Yeah.
I'll just walk right in if I can.
If they're locked though that might be a problem, in which case I'll knock loudly.
Vafrus: I will absolutely have locked my door.
Harmony: Yeah, mine's locked.
Vafrus: alright.
Yeah.
So we all get woken up to coffee one way or another.
Ruffort comes and opens the door.
there's like sounds of, "uh," you know, "don't want to get up." But
then when I open the door like 30 seconds later, I am immaculate.
I've got a new outfit on.
My hair is perfect.
And I'm just like, "Hello!" And...
Don: Ah.
Sometimes I wake up late too in a new place.
Coffee?
Vafrus: Absolutely!
Thank you!
Don: You're welcome.
I got about four more of these to go through.
Also, I can't count.
Vafrus: This is a bad quality for someone who sells coffee.
Don: It's been a problem in the past.
Tanam: Okay.
Vafrus: You can see that I have definitely been busy.
I've got a fortress made out of sheets.
I'm very proud of it.
Don: Ah.
Tanam: Do you answer your door, but you're like a little bit
to the side so that he can-
Vafrus: Mm-hmm.
.I'm just like, I'm doing the eyebrows, like, uh-huh,
Don: Have you done testing on the tensile strength yet?
Vafrus: Uh, yes.
I accidentally tested it several times as I was putting it up.
It's bad.
Don: Oh, uh, maybe we can do something about that then.
They're gonna be hard to tie them all together if they just fall apart on us.
Vafrus: Oh no, I thought you meant just like the stability of my fort.
It's made out of sheets.
Don: Oh, fort now?
No, no.
I assumed that was bad based on the, um, we'll work on
the construction if you like.
Vafrus: The construction is perfect.
It's just, it's made out of very soft sheets.
Don: Uh, we just add some metal to it.
That's what I always do.
Vafrus: Why not?
Cement too!
This'll be great.
Don: Oh good idea.
Cement!
Vafrus: Let's ask the staff for some and start pouring it on the sheets.
Don: I'm sure they won't mind.
It's for science.
Vafrus: No, it's not.
It's just for fun.
Don: Oh, uh, I thought it was for science.
Vafrus: I mean, science can be fun too, so sure.
Don: Yes!
Vafrus: Let's do an experiment to see how much cement we can fill the room with
before the staff stops bringing it for us.
Don: And, and Georg takes out a notebook and starts making some, just, general
estimates on the quantity of cement that that we can apply to the sheets
and, you know, writes all that down.
Tanam: Rozafeen, how did you accept your coffee?
Rozafeen: I actually ask Georg if he has any grounds.
Don: I mean, how do you make coffee with no grounds?
Rozafeen: Okay great-
Don: I have beans and I take out a thing of beans and then I take out a grinder and
I grind up the beans and I make about a shot of grounds and hand you the grounds.
Rozafeen: I spread 'em out on the carpet and Justice starts rolling around, rubbing
her cheeks on it, scratching her butt on the grounds, and I'm like, "Good kitty."
Don: I had no idea!
Is coffee related to catnip?
Rozafeen: I say, "I don't know.
It's a predatory instinct or something.
I guess maybe if she smells like coffee, she won't smell
like anything else around her.
It's fun to watch though, eh?"
Don: Yes.
Fascinating.
Who's a good kitty?
Tanam: How does Justice generally respond to that sort of cat infantilization?
Rozafeen: She definitely doesn't mind when I do it.
I think at this point she's gonna ignore whatever any of us are
saying cuz she's pretty committed to the coffee ground thing.
Tanam: To the coffee ground ground?
Rozafeen: The grind.
Don: The ground grounds.
Tanam: Soooooooo.
You have, successfully woken up.
That's 10 xp for everybody!
Don: We win.
Harmony: Oh yeah!
Rozafeen: Does that mean I get to level?
Tanam: Not quite.
Harmony: It's an important note: I'm wearing, when I get my coffee, a long
silk bathrobe-lingerie-kinda-like-feather thing with, um, silver sparkling
heels, and a beehive wig.
And there are lots of, like, flowers everywhere.
Vafrus: Nice.
Guys, this is great.
We should wake up every day.
Don: I'm just amazed.
I mean, I thought I woke up early, but clearly you two have beauty routines
that go far beyond my level of waking up.
By the way, I look like I have oil stains on me from cleaning my armor
the last night, and yeah, it is.
I'm rather, er, messy.
Just in general.
Rozafeen: Your armor does the looking beautiful for you.
Don: Damn straight it does.
Tanam: Okay.
So.
What do you all want to do?
At some point you should probably go back and talk to the Lord of Hospitality.
But we don't need to actually role play that.
Discussions of how much the payment's gonna be.
And, she offered you something that we can agree on later.
It is an amount that was sufficiently enticing along with
the promises of chocolate fountains.
Harmony: Cool.
Vafrus: So we did have multiple breakfasts planned this morning, and at some point
I want to go talk to the artisan because she seems like the most interesting
person we've met so far and we still haven't really like figured out her deal.
Tanam: So the artisan's, as you found out last night, is right next
door to the place where you have been promised a breakfast from Beeb.
So that would be a twofer if you were interested in doing that.
Vafrus: Let's go harass Beeb some more, and then maybe get around
to like getting anything done.
Harmony: Harass.
Okay.
Tanam: So there is more going on as you're walking from the hotel and
it's a little bit easier to see stuff since it's actually daytime now.
If anyone knows or like cares about the spider attack
yesterday, it's not really clear.
There's lots of people out and about.
There's, yeah, busking and less formal commerce going on that you can see.
And at the gate there are a couple of guards, one of whom is Da.
As you come by, Da nods ever so slightly an acknowledgement, but you get the
impression that he is not supposed to be chatting you up, while he's on duty.
Vafrus: Excellent.
He's already being inducted into this, my servitude of darkness.
He un- he understands what's going on.
Tanam: Okay.
And as you pass through the gate into the walled area,- into the courtyard-
I was, , hoping that each of you could tell me one of the stalls that you see.
So there's a bunch of these stalls.
We've talked before about the, artisan's shop and Beeb's, all day breakfast.
There's some snack spots that you passed by.
If everyone could, mention another stall that's here.
I don't have historical records of all of the shops that lined the walls.
So, we're taking some creative license here.
Vafrus: I think there should be a wind chimes stall.
Tanam: A wind chime stall.
Okay.
I will add one of those.
Anybody else have, thoughts for stalls that that they would hope would be here?
Harmony: There's also a jewelry shop.
Tanam: Jewelry shop.
Okay.
Is the jewelry shop near the Memories in Metal as kind of like a rivalry,
or is it maybe more near the front?
Harmony: Oh no.
Memories and Metal?
Where is that?
Tanam: The, up at the top, in the north.
Harmony: Oh no, I think it needs to be a little bit away from it.
Tanam: We'll, we'll put it up over in the southeast.
Harmony: Mm-hmm.
I was gonna say all the jewels are bigger, but they're like less
expensive in the quality, you-
Tanam: Hehe.
I don't know that the artisan that you guys are looking
for is so much into jewelry.
She does more like, little keepsakes and things in terms of- but maybe she
does do some jewelry stuff as well.
Don: And, well, I imagine there was a, a shop maybe called uh, Melvin's
Magnificent Machines and he sold tools and tinkered things of all kinds.
Tanam: How does Melvin feel about being by the privy?
Don: I mean, not great.
How do you feel about being by the privy?
Tanam: Maybe we'll put Melvin over on the east side then.
Don: I didn't say he wasn't by the privy.
I said he didn't feel great about it.
Rozafeen: I've got a shop that would volunteer to be by the privy.
Tanam: Okay.
Rozafeen: It sells joke versions of low-level adventuring items, so like
caltrops that are all a middle finger, or pass without a trace dust that
after a couple of seconds, if somebody else walks on top of it, it makes fart
noises, like, that level of quality.
Tanam: It's quite...
Vafrus: Pass hilarious trace.
Tanam: Anyone have name ideas for this one?
Rozafeen: How about "They'll Die Laughing."
Tanam: Oh, I like that.
And that one's by the privy.
Rozafeen: Absolutely.
Tanam: But, you know, kind of, down in the Southwest, so near the gate, but, cool.
uh oh, I've set up an enticement for you to split the party because, They'll
Die Laughing and the wind chimes shops are on the west side of the courtyard,
whereas Melvin's Magnificent Machines is on the east side of the courtyard.
Dun, Dun, Duun.
Don: I knew it.
The DM's out to kill us.
Rozafeen: I think there's probably time to visit everyone's favorite shop.
Tanam: I, yeah, I'd say maybe you guys probably-
Vafrus: We spend 16 hours at breakfast.
Tanam: I, I, I think you probably head straight to breakfast and over to Tagak's,
rather than lingering at the shops too much, but we will come back to them later!
There are a lot more people going in and out of the Hall and visiting
all the shops and stalls, and Tagak's place is busy, as is Beeb's.
Which one do you want to hit first?
Vafrus: Beeb promised us breakfast.
We cannot allow a commitment like that to go unfulfilled.
Harmony: It's definitely breakfast.
Tanam: So Beeb's, all the boards are taken off the front.
Those are, a daily close up routine.
So it's all opened up.
There's a counter where Beeb is serving food.
And there's a few tables set out in front, where some people are sitting.
There is a table that's empty, that's big enough for four, and a cheetah if
Justice is willing to sit on the floor.
Vafrus: The table for four is probably big enough for Urekas.
The rest of us can share one.
Harmony: Like, my robe is really long.
Don: Also, doesn't she have like 18 people following her?
Tanam: Yeah, I was, gonna say like, these- all these people, I
think that they didn't follow you into the office last night.
I don't think they were part of the deal in terms of getting set up with a spot.
Vafrus: Yeah, they have to camp.
Tanam: did they just kind of camp and then, wait for you to come out the hotel?
Vafrus: That's what all the sheets were for!
Harmony: Hahaha.
Vafrus: I knew it was important.
Harmony: They just kinda camped outside my window, you know, on the ground.
And they sung songs, they lit bonfires.
It was really cool.
Tanam: Once they saw that you were up, they came around the front
of the hotel and followed you.
So they're just hanging back or...
Harmony: Yeah.
Well, I mean, they don't mind sitting on the floor a little bit.
yeah, they're, they're hungry too.
They're allowed to eat.
Don: How magnanimous of you.
Tanam: So I think Beeb sees you all and blanches a bit, kind of
beckons you up to the counter.
And, is like, "Okay, so, um, the, the four of you that were here last
night, definitely breakfast. I don't know what's up with the rest of the
crowd. That was not part of the deal."
Harmony: Well, they're, they're part of me, and I'm part of them.
Rozafeen: The cheetah will also be breakfasting.
Tanam: "Oh yeah, that's right.
I you also stipulated that last night, huh?
so just like a, a, I guess I've got some cuts of meat that I haven't cooked yet.
Is that..."
Rozafeen: That sounds perfect.
Tanam: "Okay." He turns around and pulls out some meat and throws
it on a plate and hands it to you.
"Uh, I'm assuming the rest of you are not into, uh, a plate of raw meat."
Vafrus: I'll do a prestidigitation to make the plate of meat smell like coffee.
Harmony: Hmm.
Vafrus: Just to see what the cheetah does with that.
See if the earlier thing is repeatable.
Don: As long as you do that for the rest of the day.
Tanam: The cheetah looks a little confused, but is still chowing down.
Vafrus: But does not go crazy with the, okay...
Tanam: No.
No rolling on the raw meat.
Vafrus: Alas, I, I had hoped.
Rozafeen: Smelling like raw meat is not nearly as camouflaging
as smelling like coffee grounds.
Tanam: We'll just, instead of, going through the process of you all
ordering breakfast, , I'm just going to say that you get a good breakfast,
and he doesn't skimp on anything, despite the general feeling that you
got from him, but you're not worried that he spit in it or anything.
And you chill outside and eat.
Like I said, there's a lot more activity during the day, and you
can hear occasionally, from inside the Hall, big cheers.
Presumably it's, someone who put something into the mirrors.
It, came back interesting, and people had money on that.
Vafrus: Yeah, we should probably just throw all our stuff into
the mirrors and see what happens.
Don: What could possibly go wrong?
Vafrus: Just clothes, everything.
Harmony: Including the clothes you're wearing?
Vafrus: Yeah.
Yeah.
It's very important.
Tanam: Point of order.
How does that work with,
when they're illusary?
Vafrus: So the illusions.
If I was to take off my clothes and not make the illusion keep up, then
it would look very strange as I, like, pantomime taking off clothes, and then
suddenly there are clothes that I'm holding while also being fully dressed.
If I do make the illusion keep up, then it looks like whatever I want, so
it could look, you know, normal or fantastic, you know, depending on...
Rozafeen: Quote unquote, "normal."
Tanam: Okay, yeah, I, this is a problem for later us.
Harmony: Hmm.
Vafrus: for when we're all getting naked in the in the Hall.
Apparently this has been scheduled.
It's on the docket.
We can't escape it now, guys.
Harmony: That sounds fun!
Is there a sauna and a pool?
Tanam: There might be such things over in the pools, which
is, adjacent to the hotel.
but, the Hall itself is, impressive, but, there's not a lot of amenities inside.
In fact, like, all the privies and food and everything is
all out in the courtyard.
So you have a delicious breakfast and no further incidents unless
you would like to make them.
Harmony: I will make them.
I, I mean, I noticed you said that breakfast was good, but not great.
But I'm not gonna say anything.
Vafrus: Let's go talk to Tagak.
She's like right there, right?
Like, can we see her from where we're eating?
Tanam: She's currently working in the workshop, which is
visible from where you are.
Putting something in the fire and bending some metal and,
you know, doing some, crafting.
Vafrus: All right.
I'm gonna ask my spirit to go see if there's anything interesting he can see
just in and around her if she has any secrets or something that could help
with the Empire of Evil and everything.
Yeah.
Tanam: He doesn't have Mind Read- y powers or anything like that.
He's just kind of incorperal, right?
Vafrus: We haven't really talked about mind reading power.
Somehow he can tell what I'm thinking though, so, there's something going on.
Tanam: So yeah, you asked him that kind of early on in breakfast.
It's just a workshop.
Nothing of a particular note going on as far as he can tell.
Vafrus: Hmm.
She's probably not in one of the armies of darkness already.
Good, good.
That's a, that means it's an opportunity to recruit.
Tanam: About the time you guys are finishing up and she seems to be
finishing with the piece and, putting it in one of the display areas.
It's really pretty.
It's a piece in silver.
As she finishes that, looks up at all you and was obviously fully focused on
the task and is looking at you and is is like, okay, I know you from somewhere.
She half smiles,
"So, uh, did you, uh, did you, uh, decide to take on the case?
Are you gonna go and, uh, um, well, I don't know.
I'm not sure.
I feel a little bad asking anyone to "take her out," you know?
She is like my potential mother -in-law, I guess."
Vafrus: The rule is: if someone sends spiders to kill you,
you're allowed to kill them back.
Tanam: "Oh, that's fair. I like, I like, I like your rules."
Vafrus: If it was goats, then, you know, we might negotiate.
But spiders, that's the line.
So, yeah.
Tell us about your relationship.
Who is this person and why are they mad at you?
Tanam: "I mean, ' mad' is, is, probably not the right way to put it."
Don: Furious?
Um, uh, livid, um, murder?
Yeah.
Tanam: "So Teepbeedeelee, she and I, um, have been seeing each other for,
oh geez, couple years now, I think.
And we met when, she, uh, came over here.
I think she was just checking out the place, like the, the, the Hall in general.
but she stopped by and, liked, uh, some of the stuff that I made
and, and so we just got to talking and, yeah, she's really great.
Anyhow, um, so she lives with her birth mother.
Vafrus: Still living at home, huh?
Tanam: "Yeah.
And you know, it would, it would, I would say that it would be mostly fine
except, you know, they've got this oasis that her birth mother controls and,
um, you know, it's kind of her, her, her land and she's got a little tower on it.
uh, and that's, that's not the only reason why I think that
she's from the Tower Empire.
I know that there's lots of towers in the world, and that's,
and that's not what it is.
But, um-"
Vafrus: Speaking as Vafrus.
Tagak is adorable.
well done.
I love Tagak.
Tanam: "They've got a tower there on the Oasis.
And, honestly, it's a bit of a ways out, um, out in the east.
but, you know, not too far, but, I don't remember there being an oasis there.
I, I've, I've lived in this area, uh, for, for a while.
And, uh, you know, honestly since when they, were still working on the,
uh, on the Hall, and I don't remember there being an oasis out there.
I do some, some walking around and, I, I don't know for sure that I ever walked out
to that part of the desert, but, it seems like it kind of sprang outta nowhere.
uh, and that's part of the reason why I think that, you know, she's definitely
involved in some sort of magic there.
And, uh, she doesn't use any titles or anything like that, so I don't know if
she's nobility, but she has that, you know, kind of air of, of, you know,
well, 'We've got our tower,' and, and 'Who are you, you're just some, some,
you know, metalsmith, you, you, you're not worth marrying.' And so, yeah, I,
I think she just, I think she just, uh, just doesn't want me hanging around."
Don: Yeah.
I spend spiders .After all the people I've just mildly annoyed at.
Yes, definitely.
Tanam: "Well, I- you know, there's, you know, just there's
been some, some coincidences.
Don: Eight legged coincidences?
Tanam: "Well this is the first time that she sent spiders.
Um, I think she's escalating."
Vafrus: To be honest, if she wanted you dead, she could have
sent assassins, ...like spiders?.
The spiders probably wouldn't have even found you if you
hadn't been in the right place.
Like, Yeah.
Yeah.
I think you're right.
I think this is a message more than a attempt to actually do anything.
Still.
Spiders, spiders count as a death threat.
Like we can it's, it's a poor one.
It's kind of sloppy, but...
Harmony: What else has she sent, besides spiders?
Tanam: "Well, about, six months ago, I'd bought some fruit
from one of the markets in town.
And, one of the apples, uh, looked like it was fine on the outside, but on the inside
it was like totally covered in worms.
And, uh, it was super gross and I almost ate one.
And, it just like, it looked so good on the outside.
Like, like I don't think that you can have an apple that looks that good
on the outside and, and have, and have such- so nasty worm situation
on the inside without magic going on.
And I don't, I, I can't imagine why there would be anybody else who was trying
to, you know, magically mess with me.
So I'm pretty sure that was the first time, at least
that's the first one I noticed.
You know, maybe she started even more subtle.
I know that I said that she's not subtle.
and I guess it's more of like she's, she's, she started subtle and has
escalated, And then there's the, the birds that have started hanging out, around my
house at, at like weird times for birds."
Harmony: What?
What are they doing?
Are they just going in circles?
Tanam: "No, no. They land and look at my house."
Don: So she's spying on you with birds?
Tanam: "I don't know. much about magic, but, you know, it's, it could be spying,
it could be, um, that she's just, you know, trying to be spooky or something."
Harmony: Hmm.
Don: What kind of birds?
Tanam: "I, I, I don't know, like a bunch of different kinds, the different colors
and different sizes and stuff like that. They're not all just the same kind."
Don: Colorful birds or normal birds for the area.
I I what I'm saying is did she send over a a, tucan or something?
Or
Tanam: "Um, no, no, no, tucan?
I, I don't know.
I don't know birds too good.
But, um, I mean, I, I've seen most of these types of birds before around here.
uh, and definitely hanging out at oases.
but, yeah, mostly just birds from that would be around here anyway.
But like, they don't normally do that, right?
Like they're normal birds, but they're doing weird things.
Does that make sense?"
Don: Yeah.
Have you considered changing your name and moving somewhere really far away?
Tanam: Well, I mean, if, if I wanted to just not see Teep anymore, I could,
you know, just not see Teep anymore and, you know, I'm sure her..."
Vafrus: We could kidnap Teep.
That work for you?
Tanam: "Oh gosh, no.
No.
I think that would be worse.
If she's sending spiders now- her mom's sending spiders after me now..."
Vafrus: No, no kidnap, and then you leave and then she can't find you.
Tanam: "oh, like I, I, we kidnap her and then we leave together...?
Vafrus: Yeah.
Yeah.
Tanam: "Huh.
I mean- Kidnapping seems like a bad idea.
Is that... I mean, I love her.
I love her a lot, but, I..."
Vafrus: The other option appears to be murder, like, you know, I don't
really care either way, but like-
Tanam: "Well, well, but I mean, there's like a difference between kidnapping
someone you care about versus murdering someone you, you dislike. Right?"
Harmony: I like your morals.
You're good.
Tanam: "I don't know, I, I,
Don: No, this makes perfect sense.
Tanam: "like, I know, I, I know I did a pretty good job yesterday with,
with, uh, with that spider. but, uh, this is not like really my forte
like, it, it that making, uh, Metal Memories is really my, my gig..."
Rozafeen: I assume that your lover would have some feelings about killing her mom.
Vafrus: That is, that is actually a good question.
Uh, how does, how does she feel about all this?
Harmony: You're so sensitive.
Tanam: "Um, I don't know.
I, I've kind of tried to- not bring up killing her before, but I have tried
to kind of talk to her about it.
And, uh, she doesn't seem to want to talk about her birth mom too much.
I'm like, 'Hey, there's all these weird birds.
I think your mom sent them.' And she's like, uh, "Why would you think that?'"
Harmony: Hmm.
Don: Is she maybe charmed ...or.... she's,
Tanam: probably what's going on.
Yeah, I think that's a thing that, that sorcerers can do, right?"
Don: yeah,
Rozafeen: Yeah, it's definitely because she's charmed and not because we're
talking about her mother and because she's not convinced of the evidence.
Harmony: Yeah.
Do they have a close relationship?
Tanam: "I, like I said, like she doesn't like to talk about her much. And so,
we haven't really, like, you know, she hasn't really told me much about her."
Harmony: Hmm.
Where's your lover at?
Tanam: "Certainly over at the, at the tower."
Harmony: Hmm.
Tanam: "Uh, she spends most of the time there.
It's kind of hard to see her sometimes.
I'm, you know, not really welcome at the tower.
But I get, I do get to see her when she comes by.
I am worried that her, her, her birth mom's not gonna let her out.
she's gonna lock her in the tower or something at some point,
but she hasn't done that yet.
So, yeah.
Are you guys gonna go, um, kill this sorcerer?"
Vafrus: I mean, we've been hired to solve the problem and if she's
dead the problem's solved, but like, there's a lot of ways maybe we just
recruit her into an army of darkness.
You know, there's, there's a lot of, a lot of ways this could go.
Tanam: Do you say that out loud?
Vafrus: I'm just, I'm just like, toss, you know, seeing how the group reacts.
Harmony: I am nodding my head and rolling my eyes.
Don: That's odd.
Uh, definitely odd.
Tanam: "Um, I guess if she was in a, in an army, like they did, do armies of
darkness have, the strict ranks which you have to start taking orders. so if
she was that she wouldn't be able to send any, any spiders after anyone anymore?"
Vafrus: Well, only if the Lord of Darkness ordered her to, but yeah, it, it, she,
she- you'd be pretty safe I think.
Tanam: "Oh, okay. Do do you, do you have a army of darkness
that you're recruiting for?"
Vafrus: Perhaps, if you're, if you're interested,
Tanam: Okay.
Don: never told us about the army of darkness thing...
Vafrus: don't usually, I don't usually lead with the army of darkness, but yeah.
You know, it's, it's, it's, it's a little, little side project I've been working on.
Yeah.
Harmony: What if we got one of the spiders and one of the worms,
one of the birds to join the army?
We could talk to them.
Vafrus: Sounds good to me.
All right, well table that plan.
Uh, yeah.
Let's, let's go.
All right.
Yeah, we'll go, we'll see her.
Uh, we'll either convince her one way or another to stop bothering you.
We're being very well paid to do that.
You wanna come with us?
You can probably see, did you say Teep is her name or?
Tanam: "Teep, yeah."
Vafrus: Yeah.
Rozafeen: J- Wait, no.
Hold on.
Sidebar.
Tanam: Do you, do you actually take everyone aside?
Rozafeen: Yes,
Tanam: Okay.
Tagak looks after you for a second, is like, oh, they're probably
talking about what they need to talk about and so is walking around
and straightening up the shop.
Rozafeen: So I am fine with going and talking with the sorcerer person, and
if this sorcerer person threatens us, I am fine with turning her into ash with
moonbeams or whatever, standard protocol.
But I'm not fine with promising this particular artisan that
we're definitely gonna go "take care" of future mother-in-law.
I think there's a high possibility that future mother-in-law is
either fine or evil, but not the evil we're concerned with.
Vafrus: Well, future mother-in-law sent spiders to attack the Hall.
And the Hall is who hired us, right?
Rozafeen: No, no, no, no.
Future mother-in-law has been accused of sending spiders to attack the Hall.
Accusation made by someone who thinks that she also made the apple wormy.
You see-?
Vafrus: I see.
Might not be,
but c'mon, she did it though.
Don: I mean, there is the possibility she's a few eggs short of a full basket,
but, uh, we got nothing else to go on.
So we could at least, um, I don't know.
Maybe we should talk to her, uh, future, uh, the, the lady's girlfriend.
Rozafeen: I mean, I think at this point we should just be talking to a lot of people.
I'm happy to talk to the lady's girlfriend.
I'm happy to talk to the sorceress.
I'm happy to talk to people in the guard, like the, I I feel like this
is an information gathering session.
And only in the event that the sorcerer turns out to wanna turn us into pudding,
do we then have to get violent about it.
Harmony: I think that's fair.
Vafrus: I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm down with that plan.
You're, and, and, yeah, you're right.
You know, mysterious oasis tower.
If she was causing that much problem, someone would probably have taken
her out already, to be honest, like this, this is a big popular place.
If you're sending armies of spiders places and that's just a thing you
do, then you gotta get, you gotta make a lot of enemies, you know?
Rozafeen: Yeah.
Usually with someone with that personality type, this isn't their first outburst.
Harmony: We can talk to people here.
I mean, going all the way to the Tower of Sorcery and crossing North Bridge.
I mean, this place is really comfortable.
Vafrus: Oh, I don't think it's across North Bridge.
I think it's just some smaller tower.
Harmony: Oh!
Don: And the free breakfast is really nice here.
Harmony: I know it.
It was good.
Vafrus: All right.
Yeah, let's, let's talk to more people.
I'm fine with that plan.
Rozafeen: Okay, shall we make an appointment to come back to
this person to do a tower trip?
Vafrus: If, if we can't find a better candidate, we should go
attack the sorceress anyway so that we can collect that money.
Don: I'm not sure if I'm up for just murdering random people.
Ah.
Vafrus: Oh wait, that's a way better idea.
We can kill just anybody to get the money.
Yeah, nevermind.
Don: Ohhhh.
No, that's not what I-
Harmony: It's kind of bad image.
Tanam: I think that Calumn is getting some prodding.
The Prince is mentally smacking him around a bit.
Vafrus: Okay.
Calumn hushes up.
Tanam: Okay, so I think someone was asking about setting an appointment with the
artisan for directions to the tower or...
Vafrus: Oh yeah.
I was try to invite her to come with us.
Figure she's good with her tongs and she knows the way and she
wants to see her girlfriend.
Like it sort of makes sense.
Rozafeen: Yeah, why don't ask her when the best time to visit the
tower is, and indicate that that moment is not right this second.
Tanam: Do you de-sidebar?
Rozafeen: Sure.
Tanam: "Oh, okay. Uh, so yeah, when are you gonna go, uh, kill her?"
Don: I mean, you seem awful... killy.
Tanam: "Hey, she tried to murder me with spiders."
Don: Well.
Tanam: "It's self-defense!"
Don: Suuuuure it is.
you and Ruffort will get along nicely.
Vafrus: I have a question.
If it turned out somebody else tried to murder you with spiders, would you
be just as happy if we killed them too?
Don: I mean it, not "too"-
Vafrus: Instead.
My bad.
Don: Instead of.
Yes.
I think that's better.
Tanam: "Yeah, I mean I guess it's less of a two birds situation cuz
it's, you know, a 20 birds situation.
But yeah, I mean, you know, first and foremost, whoever it
was that sent the spiders, uh, should definitely be justiced.
you know, whatever form that takes.
Vafrus: I, I look at, I look at the cheetah.
"Justiced!" Is a good phrase.
Tanam: "But yeah, I mean we all know that that's going to be, you know,
murdering the Sorceress cuz you know, she's the one that did it."
Vafrus: Yeah.
Tanam: Anyhow.
Vafrus: I, I understand.
My friends like, want evidence or something though.
It's, it's fine.
We'll, we'll, we'll, figure it out.
Tanam: "So, um, yeah, now's not really a good time for me.
uh, I'm, uh, you know, kind of keep my shop going.
I'm, I'm not gonna let her scare me away from my livelihood.
But, I, uh, I usually close up around dark.
So uh, uh, do you wanna come by then and we can head over?"
Vafrus: Sound good to you guys?
We'll spend the day finding clues and stuff, and then if we
haven't found a better candidate, we'll head out to the desert.
Don: I mean, I don't have any problem heading out to the desert.
We should at least talk maybe less murder and, and more talk, unless,
you know, as was brought up, she tries to turn us into pudding.
Rozafeen: I'm on board for an investigative visit.
Harmony: My followers and I accept.
Vafrus: Cool.
All right.
Tanam: One of them is like, "Yeah, yeah!"
Harmony: [Laughs] heh
Tanam: "Let's go kill the sorceress!"
Vafrus: Okay.
I make note of that guy.
I, cool.
We have the day.
Let's, let's do some investigating.
Also, I want to throw some things into the mirrors.
Uh, let's, let's buy some stuff and then toss it.
I saw wind chime place a while ago.
Don: Very nice.
Vafrus: What if you just throw money in?
Can you get like magic coins or something out?
Tanam: I don't know if you would know that.
Vafrus: Hmm.
Okay.
Don: I, I've heard tell of, of people more money out also less money out,
but I, I don't know about coins.
That does sound like a great idea.
Tanam: So you take your leave of Tagak.
Do you want to track down anyone else in particular or just going
to shop for the rest of the day?
. Vafrus: Well there was that, that guard guy who I didn't recognize.
But, one of you might want to care about.
I don't have any other clues, so I'm just like, yeah, we'll just
hang out for the rest of the day.
Harmony: We can shop and if you want we can buy the guard guy a
wind chime just says, good favor.
You know, just establish more of a friendship than a
professional relationship.
Vafrus: I mean, I don't even know that it was a guard.
I just know that some guy was talking to me weird and then much later re
realized he was disguising his voice.
Mm-hmm.
Tanam: So you're talking about the Second, the guy in the cloak
at night in front of Beeb's?
Vafrus: Yeah, yeah.
That was, that was a thing that happened that my character missed.
But, uh-
Tanam: So, Hellena was the one who noticed what was going on there.
There was the weirdness with him disguising his voice, but I
think it was Hellena who knows definitely who it was and all that.
Rozafeen: Yes.
at the time, I opted to keep it to myself, that would've been smoother had he not
been so glaringly obvious at the very end.
Tanam: Did you tell the party?
Rozafeen: So the reason that I opted to keep it to myself in the moment is because
I wanted to take time to think about what to ask him or whether it was better to try
to observe him in some other situations.
Cause I think just walking up to him and being like, "Hey man,
were you spying in the stalls?" Like I don't know that there's much
that he would choose to say to us.
Tanam: Are you not telling the party, as a, uh, you don't know quite where
this script would take it at this point.
Don: I mean, we're not exactly subtle.
Vafrus: We should kill him and then ask him what he knows!
Rozafeen: See-
Don: if you have the right spells, I guess.
But I'd really rather we didn't.
Vafrus: My character would have not said, because actually even that's
a caricature for me, but you know.
Yeah.
Rozafeen: I maybe would've turned to Urekas and tried to
talk about charm and stealth.
But last night's hallway performance was a tad bit concerning.
Harmony: Yeah, that's fair.
There's just a one-off though.
Rozafeen: Even though I haven't told the group what I saw with the Second, it would
be logical for us to go to him and ask him if he has found any leads yet that he
would like us to assist him in following up on, and that might give me another
opportunity to observe his demeanor.
Tanam: Your characters probably would remember this.
So the Second was present at the beginning of the attack,
and then ran inside the Hall.
And then was weird about them bringing the Captain in.
The Captain is the one who is in charge of the investigation.
So you can certainly talk to the Second, uh, about it.
In fact, being how the Second seems to have worked so far, the Second might
be happy to be approached by you, especially instead of the Captain.
But in terms of the official situation, you're reporting to the Captain and
to the Lord of Hospitality, Tanovadan.
Rozafeen: Right.
I know that the Second isn't our official contact, but he is, I mean,
other than that little verbal slap that he got at the end, he is a trusted,
high-ranking member of the group.
I think that it would not be that weird for me to suggest to the party that we
go talk to him, although, we could play that out rather than me over-narrating it.
"All right, who do y'all wanna chat with first?"
Vafrus: I think the wind chime stall seemed really suspicious.
We should check that.
Rozafeen: Suspiciously great prices?
Harmony: I think let's do the wind chime stall because I feel like this is just
taking up a lot of Ruffort's brainspace.
Don: Yeah, we're not really gonna get anywhere if we don't.
Rozafeen: That's fair, sometimes you just gotta do what you need to do to focus up.
Vafrus: I'll buy the coolest wind chime I can find, and then go
throw it in the Hall of Mirrors.
Tanam: Okay.
there are a range of wind chimes.
There are ones that you don't actually have enough money for.
Vafrus: Wow.
Okay.
I'll spend 10 gold on a wind chime.
Tanam: So yeah, that'll get you, that'll get you one that's like
nice but will not make it obvious that you don't have that much money.
So you're not like buying like the second most expensive one.
it's a perfectly nice wind chime.
So you're now dragging the party along to go and put this in the mirrors?
Vafrus: Unless anyone else wants to grab things to throw in the
mirrors, feel like we should throw some things in the mirrors.
Don: I'll toss my crossbow in.
I don't really like it anyway.
Tanam: Okay.
So you head inside, and there's some signs, "Have something to throw in the
mirror?" sort of , pointing you to a desk.
Sitting behind the desk is a man who's about five feet tall, scrawny build.
He has extremely gaudy and over the top noble trader's robes.
He has very pale furless skin.
And he has long, luxurious hair pulled back in a braid that goes
all the way down to his waist, exposing his extremely pointy ears.
And you'd guess he's maybe in his fifties?
And he gestures you over to the counter that he's sitting behind and says,
"Hello.
Hello.
Welcome.
it's, uh, nice to, uh, see you all here.
It looks like you, uh, you might have things that you
want to put in the mirror?"
Vafrus: Yes, please.
Rozafeen: I do.
Tanam: "Okay. There, there will be a, a separate fee for
each item." And sidebar here.
One of the things that you were that you were given...
Vafrus: Oh yeah!
We don't have to pay fees, do we?
Don: We don't have to pay anything.
Tanam: It sounds like he does not know who you are and does not know this yet.
"There'll be a separate, uh, a separate free for each item."
Vafrus: Oh, not for us though.
We're, we're the, what's her name?
Pull up my, the, uh, Lord of Hospitality Tanovadan, uh, gave a special permission.
Uh, I am High Prince Ruffort.
This is my entourage here.
You probably recognize Urekas.
She's very famous.
Yeah.
We, we don't, we don't pay fees.
Tanam: "Hmm. so, uh-"
Vafrus: I
Tanam: "Generally, everybody pays fees. Um-"
Vafrus: Being too impatient to wait, I cast Suggestion on him
and say "We don't pay fees."
Tanam: I should have put stats on this guy.
Okay.
Don: Yes.
Who knows when you're going to have to go into combat with a random NPC.
Vafrus: Some person, not even breaking the rules and yet-
Tanam: uh, so Suggestion is a save against-
Vafrus: Uh, wisdom save DC 17.
Tanam: Okay.
uh, how wise is this guy?
Okay.
One second.
I will do the rest of his stats later.
So a 12.
Vafrus: Nope.
He needed a 17.
Tanam: Okay.
Vafrus: So just the way I said, I, I, I, like, I'm arguing with him.
I'm like, "we don't pay fees." He says, "everyone pays fees." And
I like wave my hand in a pretty obvious, like, spell casting gesture.
And I say, "we don't pay fees." And then he agrees with me.
Tanam: Is he going to, since he failed, is he gonna know that this happened?
Vafrus: I don't know.
It lasts eight hours, so it's gonna take him a minute to figure it out if he does.
It doesn't specifically say, I'm, I think not.
Don: That's actually a kind of a powerful spell.
, Vafrus: It's, pretty good.
Yeah.
We could have got a free warhorse and all I'm trying to skimp us out is fees.
We could we could've taken everything this guy owns and thrown it all in the mirror.
He, he should be grateful to me, honestly.
Don: You.
You know, we weren't gonna have to pay fees anyway though?
right?
Vafrus: taken another 10 minutes.
Don: Okay.
I suppose.
Tanam: So instead you're gonna burn a spell slot.
A warlock spell slot.
Vafrus: It's very, very important that we throw things in it this session,
and the session is coming to an end.
We need to throw things now.
Tanam: Okay.
so he, so he is like, "Oh, that's right.
Uh, you don't pay fees.
uh, I, it's weird that I forgot that.
There's an attendant there, who will, uh, uh, help you go on
with it." And he, writes down some things on little, tickets.
Gives you each one, points you over to where there is indeed a,
attendant, standing there, ready to put things into the mirrors.
Vafrus: Cool.
Hellena, you wanna go first?
You mentioned you had some.
Rozafeen: Oh yes.
I take out a bell and I put it in.
Tanam: A bell.
Okay.
Is this like a little hand bell?
Rozafeen: Yes.
It's just an ordinary, inexpensive bell.
Tanam: Okay.
Roll A 1D20.
Rozafeen: Okay.
13.
Tanam: Uh, you hand the bell to the attendant, who walks over to the mirrors
and holds it up above his head and, says, "One hand bell!" Kind of in this,
voice that, meant to echo around the Hall and, you think actually, his voice
might have been, magically enhanced, so that everyone can hear what's going on.
And, there's some murmurs, and he places it on a mirrored
surface, which is on the edge.
And he turns a crank and the mirrored surface goes out along this track, into
the center, where all the mirrors are.
And he pulls a cord and subtly all of the mirrors point towards it.
They were pointing in various directions before.
The bell just drops through the mirror that it was sitting on.
The whole hall gets silent.
It's as if everybody's holding their breath.
Moments later, a bell rises out of the mirror.
Now, can you describe what the bell looked like before?
Rozafeen: It was a blue porcelain bell about the size of my hand,
with a smooth rounded handle.
Tanam: Okay.
The bell that comes out of the mirror- From far away, it looks
kind of similar to what went in.
And he turns the crank in the other direction; the platform comes back
over and he picks it up and looks at it briefly, waves his hand over
it and says some words to himself, holds it up and, says, "It has
been: improved!" And there's some people who clap and some people who
grown and some money changes hands.
And then he walks it over to you and when he gives it back
to you, it is, the same bell.
But, there's now silver inlaid in it.
Streams of silver mixed in.
When you ring it, the sound is noticeably clearer and cleaner.
Rozafeen: Okay.
Vafrus: We gambled, We did it.
We win.
Harmony: Yay!
Congratulations!
Don: Nice bell.
Tanam: I, I won't explain the whole thing for each time you go, but if anyone else
wants to throw something in and roll...
Harmony: I wanna throw in a chocolate bar.
Tanam: You have some, chocolate, the attendant is...
Vafrus: People who have to pay fees don't usually throw in
chocolate bars, but we are special.
Tanam: well, no, I so he's, he's, "This, uh, this is, this is, this is food?"
Harmony: Yeah, I, I know it has a gold wrapper, so it looks fancy,
but there's chocolate inside.
Tanam: "And this was a-, a- approved by the, uh, By the Lord of the House?"
Harmony: I, I bought it here at the windchime store.
Tanam: uh oh.
Oh, oh.
No.
I mean, this was approved to put in?"
Harmony: Yes.
Tanam: "Okay."
Harmony: All my followers are just nodding behind me.
Tanam: Okay.
he puts it on, the thing and go ahead and roll.
D20 for me.
Harmony: 14.
Tanam: When it comes back, he looks at it, waves his hand over, holds it up.
"It has been: improved!" And, you know, there's the same kind of thing.
Money changes hands.
And he hands it back to you.
The wrapper is shinier now.
It smells better than it did before.
It just, it smells tastier.
Harmony: Cool.
Tanam: Anybody else get one?
Vafrus: Uh, yeah, I got, I got a few things.
I got my wind chimes, some leather armor, and two daggers.
The leatheren armor and two daggers, I produce from... it's not clear where.
Like I'm, I like dig in my chest and then I'm just holding them.
Tanam: The attendant is confused, but it's like, okay, this, group is weird.
So, gimme a roll for each of them and then I'll tell you what happens.
Vafrus: All right.
So the first one I got an eight, then a five, then a twelve.
Tanam: Oh, Hold on.
One at a time.
Eight first.
What did you put in first?
Vafrus: Uh, that's the wind chimes.
Tanam: wind chimes.
Okay.
You put in the wind chimes.
He holds them up when they come back and says, "They have been: disimproved!"
Uh, and, you know, there's the same, like, the same amount of, money
changes hands and stuff like that.
And he hands you back the chimes with kind of an apologetic-
Vafrus: They're exactly the but they're out of tune now.
Tanam: they're just like a little bit worse.
Like the materials look like not quite as good.
And yeah, the sound might not be as good.
Vafrus: Yep.
All right.
Second is the leather armor with a five.
So even worse here.
Tanam: It's ratty now.
looks like it's been through a lot more than it has.
Vafrus: Which is nothing.
I've never worn it.
Tanam: Yeah, so now it looks like it's taken a few stabs and things.
Whatever AC it had before, it's gonna give you one fewer.
Vafrus: It's so sad.
It's already just leather armor.
All right.
broken leather armor.
Got it.
All right.
Next up is a, uh, uh, dagger with 12.
Tanam: A dagger with 12.
this one gets improved.
It's still a 1d4.
It looks cooler now.
It's, um, it's got some like design on the handle.
Where it's just kind of like make-work dagger before, it's now a cool dagger.
Vafrus: Very important for a prince to have cool daggers.
All right finally, Woo!
Second dagger's a 19!
Tanam: So when that comes out, he holds it up and says, "It is very improved!"
and there's like some "oh, okay!" But still the same amount of money
changes hands and stuff like that.
Uh, there's one guy off in the, corner, uh, who just like, is
like, "Yeahhhh!" And you see him collect quite a bit of money from...
Vafrus: I did it for you, sir. All for you.
Tanam: this dagger now does 1d6, instead.
Vafrus: It's a sword now!
Tanam: It's like extremely sharp.
You can like hear how sharp it is, kind and it's like, yeah,
super shiny and there's like a little gem in the hilt of it now.
And some very cool designs.
Vafrus: Wonderful.
Alright.
Yeah, that's mine.
Don: Congratulations.
Tanam: Anybody else got anything to throw in?
Don: Yes.
I wanted to toss in two things.
Uh, one will be my crossbow.
It's a, uh, a light crossbow, and that one gets a... ho ho!
A one!
Oh,
Tanam: he puts it on the thing, turns the crank, it goes out, drops into the mirror,
and you sit there and nothing happens.
And nothing happens.
And eventually this little, like, poof of smoke comes out of the mirror...
Don: I think it ate my crossbow.
Tanam: The attendant turns the crank back and stands up straight and says is gone!"
Harmony: Awww!
Tanam: And he looks at you and shrugs and is like, sorry.
And there's, the same guy who yelled about the, uh, thing before, is like,
damn it!" gives a bunch of money away.
Vafrus: I like that guy.
He's betting for us.
He's, he's on our-
Don: Yeah.
he is great.
Uh, okay.
Okay.
Uh, and then I, I take my shield off of my back and I, I also toss that in.
Rozafeen: Oh my goodness!
Don: On that I get an 18!
Tanam: So it was just a normal shield, before?
Don: It's just a normal shield.
Tanam: There's no mechanical effects, um, in terms of the game, but before,
because you keep good care of your armor, was just kind of a, well-maintained
shield, it is now, very beautiful.
Almost feel a little bit bad about using it.
There's an intricate design, on the front of it.
And I will let you, the player, decide what the intricate design is.
uh, you don't have to tell us now.
Don: Yes, I'll think about it.
I've renamed it, uh, "fancy shield."
Tanam: Yeah, that's exactly what it is.
It's a fancy shield.
Vafrus: Heyyy, I named mine "fancy dagger!"
Don: I, I take one last look and then I kind of shift around
and I, I toss my bedroll in.
Tanam: Okay.
Don: 17
Tanam: It's a fancy bedroll.
A little bit more comfortable.
Don: Damn straight.
This is exactly what I wanted.
Tanam: Uh,
Don: Oh, best thing I've gotten all year.
Harmony: You should have put your coffee in there.
Don: No.
No.
Imagine if my coffee disappeared.
Harmony: Imagine.
Don: You say that like it- you know what?
I don't know if I'm going to give you coffee anymore.
Harmony: Oh!
The Intern: This episode featured
Chelsea Burns as Harmony as Urekas.
Harmony: Think about the good times we've had.
The Intern: Chris Grumbles as Don as Georg.
Don: Oh, a wise guy, huh?
The Intern: Desiree Phair as Rozafeen as Hellena and Justice.
Rozafeen: I think that leather armor goes right back in.
The Intern: Sylas Silver as Vafrus as Calumn as Ruffort.
Vafrus: It's back up to a plus two bonus once it's a bikini.
The Intern: Mark E. Phair as Tanam the dm.
Tanam: it has been... improved!
The Intern: And me, Damian Lichtenstein, as the Intern.
Thank you for listening to Coffee, Cults, and Empires.
Edited by Mark and Desiree.
Music by Kevin Vitz-Wong.
Character art and logo design by Carmanda.
Sensitivity consulting by Dominique Dickey.
Support us on Patreon for access to outtakes, worldbuilding, and more!
Find all these links in the episode notes or at coffeecultsandempires.com,
where you can also find transcripts, art, actor and character bios, and more.
That's coffeecultsandempires.com.
Tanam: Disimproved!